What are the 9 Traits of Narcissism?

In order to have a true diagnosis of Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) a person must have 5 of the 9 traits of the disorder.  This video talks about the 9 traits that need to be seen in order to determine a true narcissistic character of a client.

The motive behind harming others is what distinguishes a narcissist from a psychopath.  Narc's main objective is to protect their image that they want others to see as them. Psychopaths simply enjoy harming people, get a "rush" out of it, and have no remorse over what they do.

Recap on The Disorders

Over the past 5 days, personality disorders have been discussed. Narcissistic Personality, Avoidant Personality, Borderline Personality, Paranoid and Dependent Personality, and Histrionic Personality disorders all have different characteristics and can occur with each other in a person. I explained the basic traits of each disorder as follows: Narcissistic Personality Disorder involves a person having a false-persona that he/she will protect at all costs, through using defense mechanisms such as projection, grandiose thinking, and entitlement. Avoidant personality is seen in people through their desires to avoid doing new things, socializing with people, and not wanting to take risks, due to their desire to not be made fun of or do things wrong. Borderline people tend to have very deep-seated emotions and react to perceived rejections and abandonment by self-inflicted harm, threats of suicide and other types of defenses. Paranoid people tend to have irrational fears that have no proven basis. Dependent personality disorder is seen in people clinging to others, expecting others to make important decisions for them, and deep insecurities when not with the people they are dependent on. Lastly, Histrionic disorder shows up in the person who demands that all eyes remain on him/her, and who will act seductive or showy in order to be sure that they do.

The Disorders: Borderline Personality Disorder

A person with Borderline Personality disorder is emotionally and psychologically irratic. They will do anything to keep you from leaving or rejecting them, whether threatening suicide or trying to make you feel guilty for things. Addictions are common in this disorder…self-mutilation, drinking, eating disorders, cutting are also part of it. Borderlines feel non-existent so they will do things to make themselves “feel” like they are materialized. People with this disorder tend to cling, will alternately pull you close and push you away, can become the center of attention at the expense of others. Dissociation is part of the disorder, as is “losing time.” Borderlines can be heard to say “I don’t remember” because they will black out at times and not realize what they just experienced. It is difficult to be a close friend of a person who has this disorder, because you can be accused of plotting against your friend, and often, you may be seen as not truly caring for them.

Recap of End of November to Early December

of the past week we discussed information about people with Borderline Personality Disorder and Narcissistic Personality Disorder. I explained how both Borderlines and Narcissists have a fear of you leaving them, but for different reasons. I also told about the exhaustion that comes from trying to befriend or help either type of person, the similarities and differences between the two personality disorders, and what it is like to be cornered by both. Though both NPD and BPD are disorders involving the personality, the traits of the narcissist make him or her very difficult to relate to and especially, get close with long-term. The Borderline, by nature, craves relationships of intimacy, but because of his or her tendency to become too clingy, needy, and unstable, people who try to bond with them also feel that it can be almost impossible to have a fair give-and-take relationship. Borderlines can be helped through therapy, whereas, simple talk-therapy alone will never help the true narcissist.

5. Being Cornered by Narcissists and Borderlines

Both people with narcissistic and borderline personality disorders use silent treatment, overreactto things, watch you to see what they should do or say next, corner you, live in 3rd person (and someties speak in it) Dealing with people who have either issue is difficult and feels almost impossible. My view of how to overcome the hurts that are caused by disordered people, is to read the Bible and learn what GOD thinks of you. One of the reasons people who were victimized have a hard time moving on without the narcissist, is that they don’t know who they are without him or her. God has some wonderful things to say about and to you in His Word, as you will learn on this video.

4. Similarities and Differences Between BPD and NPD people

There are similarities between people’s behaviors that have NPD and BPD. They are as follows: Both avoid TRUE intimacy, have inner shame, are selfish, carry shame, have mood changes, ignore people’s feelings, project their issues onto others, live in denial (BPD’s will however, admit they have issues and want help), act out of defense from perceived wounds, will gaslight others, isolate others, and value/devalue people. The main difference in the behavior of the narcissist versus the borderline, however is that the borderline shows remorse after doing something or saying something that is hurtful or wrong, and the narcissist shows no remorse, but only entitlement and grandiosity, with lack of empathy.

3. Both Narcissists and Borderlines Are Passionate and Can Exhaust Their Victims

People with these disorders feel inadequate and are often needy perfectionistic and self or false-self focused. Both demand excessive attention but different types of this. Borderlines will pull away from you if they perceive that you reject them yet they will return to you out of fear of rejection and abandonment (I hate you. Don’t leave me!) They are self-punishers who internalize blame; this entails pills, cutting, self-harm, and eating disorders. Narcissists will use manipulation, rejection and anger if you are about to leave them. They use gaslighting (trying to make you feel insane) in order to control you and make you more dependent on them so you will do what they want. Narcissists want to be adored and want you for their slave, Borderlines want you to be their savior. Both people with BPD and NPD are very demanding, all-encompassing, passionate about getting what they want, and can cause the victim to become depressed, trapped, and miserable.